I cycled home after 7 last night, our two day child minding gig done, a still warm veggie stir fry from Emily in a container in the green mesh grocery bag over my shoulder, the light on the front of my bike illuminating about as far as the end of my front tire. The night was dark and cold, stars had started to appear and I loudly and carefreely sang Bye Bye Miss American Pie to the frosty night sky and the cows in their stalls. I was on a natural high; the successful partnership of Em and I managing to keep the kids safe and happy for two days- we even managed to get them all out for a walk, no small feat but worth the effort for it was cold and refreshing; the knowledge that I had managed to garner 101 subscribers (over halfway to The Fireman story! and 111 upon waking this morning! -yippee!!); and Em’s sister in law Sandrine telling me that she was translating my posts and reading them and that they make her emotional. We didn’t have a chance to get into the ‘why’ they make her emotional; with three children on the edge of hunger there were more pressing issues. Maybe because she herself is an immigrant from Martinique. Although she hasn’t faced the same language issues that I have but I am sure there have been cultural adjustments. Or maybe she was emotional thinking of poor, little retired anglophone me, fumbling my way through life here. It doesn’t matter really; I struck a chord which is all I want to do with everyone who is following along. I want to make people laugh, cry, commiserate, wonder, learn…… And Sandrine shared too that Annie has been trying to make her way through them so she is going to show her how to copy and paste the posts into a translator tool. Now I can truly say I have an international audience!
Last week I asked Em if she thought people here would address their boss as Mr. or Mrs. For many of us of a certain age we remember when that was the case and are happy it is much more informal now. Em has always worked from home here as an independent contractor so has no experience in a work environment. We guessed that yes they probably do as there does seem to be an old school formality about life here and we have heard Francois refer to their banker as Mrs. In fact I created, and quickly corrected, a faux pas at the hairdresser’s on Friday when I referred to her by the informal “tu” and not the more formal and respectful “vous”. (Incidentally I did this all wrong when I first met Francois’ parents but again, they are so gracious that they accepted “tu” right from the beginning. Talk about starting out on the wrong foot!) The stylist by the way, told me through gestures and a smile that “tu” was okay when I caught myself and corrected to “vous”. Phew! Just another facet of this 2nd language I have to consider and apply. I am telling you; it is a lot to consider when attempting communication!
A few days later Francois came home from work and was telling Emily about his day. Excitedly he is in discussions with a distributor in Quebec which means that some of their wines could be making their way into at least one Canadian province sooner rather than later. And he shared that when he hung up he said to his mom, with whom he shares the office, “That was so weird, the man called me Francois!” Yup. By French cultural norms 32 year old sweet, generous, absolutely no ego at all Francois expected to be referred to as Mr. David. 
He doesn’t know this man, they haven’t reached that kind of friends stage of their business relationship so his expectation is that the exchange would be more formal. Isn’t that just so interesting?? Doesn’t it make you appreciate how easily things can go off track when two different cultures don’t understand some of the nuances of each other’s ways?
And now here I am, facing an osteo appointment at noon with a practitioner that Em and Co go to who speaks zero English. I know ‘J’ai tirer un muscle dans mon dos’ so I will be able to share with him that I have pulled a muscle in my back. Although that could be a little tricky as I actually don’t know how to say ‘muscle’ in French. Hopefully I get close enough that he translates my off pronounciation and understands me. Surely the context will help. And I have to find out his last name so I call him Mr. And use ‘vous”. And figure out a way to do charades and communicate while lying face down on an examination table. Probably withut my glasses which will render me blind as a bat and unable to see Mr Xs charades unless he brings them in close. Mercifully not stripped to my underwear; that would be an extra layer (or non layer as the case might be) of challenge! Dear sweet protective Emily suggested she drive me and walk me in to the clinic as there are several different medical services there to make sure I get the right one. #When the child becomes the parent. I reassured her I could manage this part on my own. It was the after the appointment starts that would be a challenge. And that no, I didn’t need her to come to that with me. Not that she offered. That might have been too far for her personal comfort. Somehow I will manage to get treated and get my 52 euros worth of service. And yes, I will update you tomorrow on how this all plays out…..
If you subscribed before yesterday and haven’t received an email from me, check your spam. I have written two, short, welcoming notes. At this point I am using a free service so can’t set it up so that an email goes to people as they subscribe. Maybe one day I will have so many readers that I will invest but for right now free works. Sort of. The first email had a 96% open rate while the 2nd a 78% with a 100% delivery rate on both. When I do a test one to myself for some reason it always lands in my spam account.
Thank you all for joining on this journey and being so encouraging. It is a highlight of my day writing about my foreign life and how I got here and all sorts of other things, reading in your comments a connection that we have made with each other.
A bientot! xo
I remember a few years ago when we were both attempting to learn French through duolingo. The for at changed and they lost me. But you stuck with it and are well on your way to becoming bilingual. Mind you, you have the best reason in the world to work at that! I admire your perseverance. Your sense of humour helps too, I’m sure!
A sense of humour, especially the ability to laugh at yourself, helps for sure. Otherwise I think one would be too self conscious about “failing” which I do to some degree in every interaction. And the Duolingo days! I have to start building that app back into my life Mimi. I really found it helped me with vocabulary.
Congratulations on an International audience!!
Sounds like you and Em had a great, but busy, 2 days.
We usually always addressed adults as Mr & Mrs growing up. We taught Caitlin to do the same but some would correct her and want to be called by their first name.
Hurry up folks…I want the fireman 👨🚒🚒 story 🤪
Yes, I raised my kids the same way Donna but oddly enough, it seems that children here do call adults by their first name (if they know them) but with the formal “vous”.
I love you blog.
I have not received an email and there’s nothing in my spam.
You probably registered after I send the 2nd one out, about mid day on Saturday. I will do another one soon as there have been quite a few new registrants since then. Hope you have a good day Denise!
Good luck with the Osteo. They will find what’s going on….no need to worry about explaining. We find where health is not being expressed. Can’t wait to hear how you make out. Still see an L 5 – S 1 issue.
Keep working on that distance healing for me when you have the time and energy Andrea; I really felt an improvement after your last treatment!
First off, kudos to you for driving your bike in the dark with little light ahead of you. That would be scary to me 😳. Good luck with your osteo appointment. I think hand gestures would be my language choice. He may end up fixing something you didn’t even know needed fixing.
Holding out for the dating stories … Can’t wait. I’m wondering if the fireman lit your fire or put it out 🔥
Oh my gosh Wendy, you have such a way with words! You will have to wait and see just what the fireman did for me! 🙂
And it is a bit scary, especially when it is hard to see the road ahead! 😐
I can picture you biking home on those dark streets with light on, your bag slung over your shoulder, and I giggle! Silly me didn’t know I could subscribe!! Done now!
Our kids also used Mr. and Mrs. when addressing elderly, and still do for certain people, but I think it’s not as common now…
Good luck with your back, if you need to, you could always show a picture of a body and point to where it hurts!😁
Yay! You are now a subscriber! Now bookmark the page so it is easy for you to access with your morning coffee!
I replied to Donna’s comment on this post in telling her that first names seem more commonly used for children here; however with “vous” not “tu”.
Good morning all the way from Enfield. I laughed while reading thinking of you just a peddleing you legs off in the dark just a singing. What a woman 😂. Michelle, just wonder if you ever or considered taking French lesson ? One other thing, i have never gotten a reply to any of my notes, strange eh. Take care my friend.
Oh yes, besides doing the app Duolingo I did a semester with a UNB prof 1:1. Now I really think it’s on me to learn more words and how to conjugate verbs…. And what notes Sandra? Am I missing something?
Good morning Michelle, I hope the osteo appointment went okay! I had my first appointment with a chiropractor on Friday and he asked me questions constantly for a half hour. I can’t imagine doing that without speaking the language! You amaze me every day. I love reading your post every morning with my tea, it is always a bright spot of my day. Cheers!
Ill write about it tomorrow but yes! You can relate!!
I love reading about all your adventures. Your bravery in exploring the countryside and learning a new language is inspiring. Looking forward to the Fireman and more!
Bonne journee!
I guess I don’t feel brave really Susan, it’s just what I have to do if I am going to be here for extended periods….. but I understand from the outside looking in it might seem a little (okay, a lot!0 out there!
I love that I can totally see that bike ride after being there. It gives ready your blog a different level for me. I love it and your French country life!! Good luck.at your appointment, Hopefully you get some relief 😌
It was nice to have company on those rides home though I didn’t feel inclined to sing then. 🙂
Oh Michelle I’m laughing out loud just picturing you at the doctors. Can’t wait to hear how it went. Reading your next blog now. I keep 2 or 3 blogs before reading because one is not enough, like a good book I never want it to end. Love that the author is my friend. I can just picture you and hear you. I often reread parts out loud to Daniel and we laugh together. Xoxo